Thursday, October 29, 2009


I like to eat dead animals.  Dead cows, dead hogs, dead chickens, dead fish.

I'm a carnivore.  Technically, I'm an omnivore, but I could honestly do without vegetables, fruit, or grains and live completely off of meat.  Apparently I wouldn't live long, but I would live happy and content.

For my fiftieth birthday we had some friends over to the house and I grilled t-bone steaks.  Not whimpy little 6 oz. steaks.  Nope, I went to Sam's, found some 1" thick t-bones, and told the guy I needed 12 of them.  Watched him cut them.  Set me back a few bucks, but it was my birthday and my friends.  These suckers were so big that some of the women were wanting to split them with each other.

Not me.  And if company hadn't been over I would have never used a knife and fork--just picked it up by the bone and started gnawing.  And I promise you the bone would have been clean when I was done.

16 oz. of steak, at least.  That's a lot of meat.

So when the instructions for "The Five Day Food and Water Challenge" said this: "Meat is a luxury, with the average African consuming about ¾ ounce per day—the size of a small chicken nugget," I knew I was in trouble.

What's the fewest number of McNuggets you can buy at McDonald's?  4 in a kids meal?  Six for adults?

And I'm supposed to eat only one a day?!

But that's not really the problem, is it?  The problem is that the average African only eats about 3/4 oz. of meat a day.

Wonder what the meat cutter at Sam's would have said if I had asked him for a 3/4 oz. t-bone?

"Sir, I'd like a steak the size of a small McNugget."

We Americans really do live in an alternate universe from the rest of the world, don't we?

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